IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, really.......I wish I had a dollar for every time my boys screamed this phrase at each other, (or even at me for that matter.)

Justice is a big deal to kids, well, to all of us really. We have within us a sense of fairness, maybe not in relation to everyone else, but certainly for OURSELVES!

And no matter how many times I get frustrated and say, "well, Life's not fair!" I still go back and try to make it all fair.

I try to make Christmas "fair" (spending the same amount of money on each kid)

I try to make mealtime "fair" (dividing the strawberries so everyone gets 5 each)

and even trying to make punishment "fair"

This may be the hardest one of all.

Example: I am making dinner. The boys are supposed to be getting showers/ jammies and cleaning their rooms. Upstairs we have 3 bedrooms (everyone has their own) but only one bathroom, so I hear.......

screaming like this..........

"Gross!! flush your poop!!"

"It stinks in here!"

"YOU STINK!"

"I can't take a shower in here!"

"Don't touch me!"

"Mom said you have to take a shower, so SMELL IT!"

"FLUSH THE TOILET!" (flush)

"MOM!!!!! MICHAEL FLUSHED THE TOILET WHILE I WAS STILL SITTING ON IT"

BAM

BOOM

CRASH

"STUPID"

"DUMMY"

BAM

BOOM

CRASH

"STOP IT"

"YOU STOP IT"

"YOU STARTED IT"

"MOM!!!!!!!!!!"

"TATTLE-TAIL!"

So I go upstairs and everyone starts talking at once. Someone will start crying usually, and ALWAYS I hear what the other person did that was wrong. The injustice dealt, and the punishment they should recieve.

Never once, in my life, have I heard a child (mine or anyone's) walk up to the mom and say, "I just did my best at trying to kill my brother.......I should be grounded for the rest of my life."

I send everyone to their room. Get the story from everyone, separately.... and then try to decide what the punishment is for trying to kill your brother (physically or with a stink bomb).

The punishment is never strong enough for the brother and always too strong for them.
And once again, "IT'S NOT FAIR"

I decided last year that the punishment should be the same, no matter what the offense.

So I said, "you were both fighting, you are both grounded"

"BUT HE STARTED IT"

"YOU have the choice and the power to do what is right, no matter if everyone else is doing something wrong. It doesn't matter who started it, hitting someone is a sin and you are both grounded".

"that's not fair! you are the WORST MOTHER EVER!"

In my anger, I will not sin. Ephesians 4:26

I quote this often in the heat of battle. Sometimes for the kids benefit and sometimes for my own. (they have no idea how far I have come with self control)

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23

For the wages of sin is death Romans 6:23

BUT THAT'S NOT FAIR!!!!

........Romans 3:24 but we are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.

.............Romans 6:23b but the GIFT of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Thank you God for your grace and mercy. Thank you God for your son Jesus.

Thank you God, that my life is not fair.

I DID NOT vote for Obama.

but I will pray for him.

I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone- for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.
I Timothy 2:1-2

When the Godly are in authority, the people rejoice, but when the wicked are in power, they groan. - Proverbs 29:2

You can join a team of people called the Presidental Prayer Team.

www.presidentalprayerteam.org

It's really a BRAND NAME product you know........

Okay, so.....as I have said before, my brain is random.

So I started thinking about all the things in America that we use by the BRAND NAME.

You know.......like,

Band-Aids

Play-dough

Kleenex

Tylenol

(it's really adhesive bandages / facial tissue / acetaminophen / and who knows what Play-dough is really..........all I know is Play-dough)

And in the south, all soda is COKE.

And then there is God.

Yeah, the real one.

..... so many people in America are into the generic form of God.

It got me thinking.

If God had a copyright on HIS name, he would be REALLY, like- SUPER rich.

But then, God doesn't really seem like the sue happy type to me.

What is my random brain getting to?

Be careful.

Don't use the word GOD like a generic product. (He can hear you, you know)

and besides that,

it's just not right. He even says so.

(Try Exodus Chapter 20 if you don't believe me)

...You can always come home.

Last night Zion had a sleep-over at a friend's house.

10:37pm, the phone rings.

That first thought of a late night phone call is never good.

I muster up my most cheerful, "hello?"

"Hi Melda, it's Felicia"

"Is everything okay?"

"Zion misses his mommy and wants to come home"

"That's fine. I'll come get him"

"NO NO, I'll bring him home, we will be there in 10 minutes"

The 10 minutes seemed like 10 hours. Zion is my 'baby', but he usually goes places without a thought. Even as a toddler, he never was the kid screaming at the nursery door at church.

I meet them at the car, barefoot and in my jammies. Zion jumps out of the car, runs to me and throws his arms around me. I almost lost it there. I thank them for bringing him home and apologize for the late night. As I pick Zion up, he wraps his arms, (and legs) around me tight.

As we come in the house, he hops down from my arms and heads up to his room. I follow him up and help him get ready for bed. I didn't ask any questions, I just waited.

As I snuggle him in and kneel beside his bed for prayers, the pout forms and the tears start.

"Zion, did something bad happen at their house?"

a teary 'yes' was his reply.

Again, I wait.

"They have a TV in their room and they were watching a scary show.........

.....I wish I could just sleep in YOUR bed tonight."

So back down the stairs we went.

As we come into the bedroom, Mike gives me that half smile. He knew that was coming.
Zion climbs us in the middle of our bed, snuggles in and closes his eyes. He is home. He feels safe.

I said, "Zy, no matter where you are, you can always come home"

And in that moment, I felt the love of my heavenly Father.......Abba, Daddy......
No matter where we are, what we have done........we can always come home.

Happy New Year! 2009

So who started new years resolutions?

It seems to be the topic of newscasts, newspapers and neighborhoods. In fact, even our church is doing a series called, "Under Construction": discussing ways that God is always using us to build and shape and mold ourselves to be more like Him.

Because of all the hype, without much prompting, I think most of us find ourselves looking back on the last year, and thinking about ways to improve the next.

#1 doesn't everyone (almost) vow to eat better or exercise more (or both?)
How is that REALLY possible with four college football games New Year's Day?
(have you EVER been to a football party where something healthy was offered to eat?)

Okay, I admit it, I think I would benefit from more exercise and less junk food.
But it really does TASTE better than salad, and I hate to run.
The real motivation has to come from somewhere.

Last year my father-in-law died at the young age of 57. He had liver failure and heart problems, and was unhealthy for most of the time I knew him. Overweight, smoking and watching TV for a sport. He was a wonderful, caring man. He would, literally, give you the shirt off his back. In fact, when Mike and I married, we didn't have a mattress, he gave us one. We didn't learn until later, that he gave us HIS.

Would his life be different if he hadn't smoked?

.......if he had walked a mile (or 2) instead of watching a 30 minute sitcom?

........IF...............

WHAT IF ?

What if I KNEW that I could add 10 years to my life by walking that 30 minutes after work?

What if I knew that eating an apple instead of a bag of chips would prevent a heart attack when I'm 60?

What if I knew the future and could see the results of my actions?

Wouldn't that be ROCKING COOL??

Wouldn't it be EASIER to make the right choices if I just KNEW the outcome?

Jeremiah: 29
This is what the Lord Almighty the God of Israel says....
Build houses and settle down: plant gardens and eat what they produce. Marry and have sons and daughters. Increase in number. Seek the peace and prosperity of the city, because if it prospers, you too will prosper. For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

I believe the outcome has been chosen for me.........

will I do what it takes to make it happen?

Maybe I will take a walk and think about it....... and take an apple with me.

Happy New Year!

Did I mention my brain is RANDOM??

Just so you know.............

I created this blog to journal memories, for the most part. I am a scrapbooker, but never can seem to find the time to DRAG IT ALL OUT and get the stories with the photos. So...... since a picture is only worth 1000 words IF you have the story........ my goal is to go through my photos, and write (type) the memories that the photos bring to mind.

So, if people with ADD drive you nuts........don't read my blog.

It's TOTALLY random and not in ANY kind of time line order.

Seriously, I can't fix that.

Christmas Milestone

Well, I just realized today, (after doing a little math) that this Christmas is a milestone for me. It will mark my 20th Christmas as a Thornton, passing up the 19 years I spent as a Garrison before marriage.

I grew up in a small farm town in Alabama, not even a mile from at least 3 sets of relatives. I spent time at my grandparents every week. And we had a "Waltons" style get-together to celebrate family birthdays and holidays. Christmas was HUGE, I mean, not tons of presents, but tons of people, food, and fun. When I think back, I am actually amazed at the folks that my Papa and Granny packed into a modest size home. My grandmother always opened the door to greet you with a smile, ready to feed you and make you feel welcome. I remember my parents, aunts and uncles playing games and laughing for hours. I don't have a SINGLE memory of watching TV ......not because I don't remember, but because we just didn't watch it. WE PLAYED.......what a concept!

Last but not least, it would be time to sing. I don't know if it's an old fashioned tradition, or if it just comes from a family of music lovers.........but old church hymnals would be passed around, someone would sit at the piano and another person would call out the number of their request. We usually started with Christmas songs, but ended up with good 'old hymns of any kind. Everyone sang along and all harmony parts were represented.

I don't think I really understood the value of family and my upbringing until I married a Navy man and moved from home.

I remember being shocked at the people we met that didn't go to church, not regularly, not ever.

"I will never fit into this life", I thought, and I begin to get homesick.

I was 19 working at a grocery store.......
too scared to "run home" and with a car that wouldn't make it even if I got up the courage.

At some point, an older, wiser military wife took me under her wing.

She told me, "Mike is your family now, those other people are just relatives."

I was actually offended by her comment, and deeply hurt.......she doesn't know me, my family, they will ALWAYS be my family!

Genesis 1:24 "for this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife"

She wasn't right, was she?
Was God telling me to stick it out?

What I knew in my heart was that my family was close. We had always been there for each other. Things weren't perfect........ but we loved each other, before, during and after the hardships that had come our way. Hadn't the good outweighed the bad? What had I learned from my small town life that could possibly help me here in this mess?

I realized that having a great family is a wonderful blessing from God. But what got my family through hard times was not just leaning on each other. It was a faith in THE ONE that is strong when we are weak. It was a trust in THE ONE that will never let you down. It was standing on God's promises, when nothing else seemed clear.

I am thankful for my family this Christmas. My husband, my children and my extended family (relatives?) I am thankful for the lessons learned, (even the ones learned the hard way) and I am most thankful to a God that has held me in the palm of his hand every Christmas of my life.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

(Garrison family photos - Thanksgiving 2007, Cullman Alabama)

l-r Zion Thornton and Caleb Garrison (my "little" brother) playing football

Derrick Garrison (my other "little" brother) with Isaac Thornton on the 4-wheeler